How am I an introvert…and how am I an extrovert…

Besides actually being an extrovert or introvert, there are certain character traits that entail one or the other.

In reality no one is probably just an introvert or just an extrovert. It completely depends on the situation, maybe even the mood or the day. A lot of people say they are introverts until they know somebody. Maybe this is what they call ambivert (?) or the one that’s supposed to be in between/both of them.

I for one do things/have qualities that are both introverted and extroverted. Most people that know me will readily say I’m an introvert, without paying attention to or even noticing/appreciating all of the extroverted things I do. I can actually be quite the extrovert, and out-extrovert the extroverts. I do some things that are even more extroverted than extroverts.

Something an introvert does is sit inside all day, and prefer that. I’m not saying that I don’t sometimes prefer chill days, but my chill days also are usually because I have to do things that are inside at-home tasks. I would say having a routine and only being inside because you have to do things and are doing things are all extrovert sounding things to me. Doing things=extroverts. Maybe I am equating introverts to people who just sit and do nothing, and maybe that is wrong, but oh well.

And then, the craziness that was being at camp for over a month and living with three other girls and being by 80 people all of the time. There was no privacy. Obviously, the bathroom is communal too. Even if I WANTED to cry…well I would have to first make peace with the fact that I didn’t have power over the schedule or timing, could be called down to do a task at any second or to meet with everyone, or by someone, or get asked a question by a kid, etc.

So that was very social and extroverted and I thrived in that setting. As well as the rough sleep schedule. I could tell people got their social batteries drained, but I was fine. Yes maybe it was rough at times but not actually because I kept it all in and had practice doing so. I could be around those people any time, and I was only sad to see the end of it and to leave. I wasn’t ready to stop socializing with those people. All of that is very not introverted behaviour, and very much extroverted.

And going straight from that, into another trip, just being able to work on that kind of schedule, and flexibility, are very extroverted things to do (in my opinion). Cause that’s not what I imagine an introvert to be. And all the more, having practice with this kind of thing. Not just doing it once to never do it again but doing it constantly, over and over again, repeatedly, and getting used to it.

I can also be very spontaneous and my lifestyle has always been busy and go go go. Thriving on tasks, to do lists, and routine. One second I don’t know what I’m doing, the next figuring out what I’m doing with my day, as I go, and the next asking my friend to spontaneously do something. That is extroverted behaviour to me.

Even I have not always viewed myself in any sort of “extroverted” way. That’s because the way I was viewing “extroverts” was a very limited worldview. Because most people, how they view extroverts is the same. All they say is that it’s how much friends you have, how much you hangout with people. In that comparison, yeah, I had people around me in my life who were way more “go go go” and hanging out all day everyday with all sorts of people.

But amount of friends and amount of hangouts, really have nothing to do with how extroverted someone is. That’s a stupid way of thinking. Amount of friends, is a personal choice and a choice of who to be friends with. That’s based on proximity and a lot of factors of why we in general choose a certain someone to be our friend. How much we hangout with them? Also completely dependent on so many factors, that it’s stupid using that as a measure. We could have really busy friends, or friends that live far away, have a car situation, etc.

But maybe another conventional way of viewing an extrovert is someone who NEEDS or CRAVES hanging out or being with people. In this way I can say I can be both an introvert and extrovert. But again, it just depends on the people we are talking about hanging out with. There are certain people I can and do hangout with everyday. Constantly. And obviously enjoy it. So in that way sure I guess you could say I crave it. But also don’t depend it. Like I’ll be okay doing something chill or sitting with my thoughts (to an extent…)