Me vs my friends (the people I attract)

I attract

Orthodoxy

School oriented

The worst procrastinators you’ll ever meet (apparently)

Always wear dark colors and absolutely not bright colors

Russian or a culture that is not American

My friends: Have ALWAYS been procrastinators lol (but still very school oriented) and they also

The school-oriented, that probably just happened because a.) we were in the classes, or, if i might them a different way: b.) well they were probably Russian so that culture already decided that for them or c.) a different culture that is ALSO school-oriented (so like, how I was never necessarily friends with Americans in high school). We just had much too different values to hit it off.

I feel what I’m realizing is that a lot is determined by the way you grow up. The way you’re raised, the ideas you’re instilled with, and your culture. Because growing up, I was instilled with the school idea, so then naturally those became my friends (even through something as simple as being enrolled in/taking the same classes, then). And just like with the orthodoxy, since that is what I was surrounded by, those were the friends I made. All because my family…and basically parenting. So because…it seems based on the values or what’s important to the parents…is basically the type of friends you’re going to give your kid.

What’s funny is that they are all procrastinators, but I am just the opposite. And same with the dark colors. I wonder if this is just because most people do are this way/ do these things, so that’s just statistics…or something about me being the opposite. Opposite attract?

I never really attracted Americans, and I always attracted the other races because I feel like we just vibe more with the culture and values. And, I was always a shy kid in high school, and I feel like those were also the shy kids. It was always the American kids that were loud and obnoxious and clearly thought they fit in or even ruled that environment. But maybe me and my friends and those people I attracted, we all just felt like we didn’t belong (at least I felt that way) and we were more shy and reluctant and that’s why we were drawn to each other. And we both could just agree that the spoiled obnoxious kids were dumb and annoying and had no values, no culture, just so boring that we didn’t want to be anything like it, near that, or become like them. More of role model/ example of what not to be.

To me, it makes sense the people I attract and the people I’m surrounded by. But that’s not to say that some of the other people I guess you could say I attracted, or that I’m simply surrounded by or friends with or have been friends with, have been or are nothing like me, and quite opposite, in many ways. And simply we just aren’t the same, don’t do the same things, like I would never do what they do…etc.

But I think why I drove these people near me is through non judgement. Probably thanks to the orthodoxy in a lot of ways, because that’s where I feel like I got my morals (or just family/cultural values too). Even though they were so different, I didn’t mind. It was more entertaining and amusing for me, just like a little kid in a storybook, to get to see people who lived a different lifestyle than me. Doesn’t mean they were wrong and I was right. I didn’t mind what they did. I knew I didn’t want to copy, but can we coexist, can we live, laugh, love, and observe each other and be friends? Why, of course!

Maybe not many people believe this that I believe…that you can be friends with people who are very different from you. Who do things you don’t like. A.) you don’t have to copy. B.) you don’t have to judge (and it’s not your place to judge, so I don’t even know why this would be a consideration, at least, I’m not in the place). C.) if anything, it’s just a confirmation of what you want to do in life and the things you want to do and the way you want to live your life…there is no judgement attached. I don’t know why that’s so hard to understand. It’s common sense to me. Not everything and every relationship has to be filled with judgement. On the contrary. Also D.) you can’t change them or make them care.